Sunday, 14 September 2014

8 Bitter Realities of Life that Help You Grow

Wisdom comes over time, and it comes with loss, lessons, experiences and triumphs. It slowly builds a character then, that too after doubts, exploring unknowns and going through unpaved paths. This is how wisdom and character are sculpted. Desire of happiness and success is what moves us, and if there were a definitive path to happiness and success, everyone would have been on it. Alas, there is no such path. You will have to travel every mile of your journey, you will have to go through failures too, because seeds of progress are planted in past failures. Your greatest struggles become your best stories once you overcome them. So keep trying, keep learning, and keep living.

We all go through several hardships of life, including sudden death of our close ones, losing our best friends, unexpected business loss or being thrown out of job. These experiences are cruel and keep you down for a while. But once tough times are over, we built better understanding of life.

So it is actually wise to know harsh realities of life that we all experience, and treat them as friends that are going to help us grow and be wise. Here are some thoughts to consider;

1. Your biggest problems often exist in your mind only

Happiness and success is ultimately dependent on two elements, the way you think, and the way you act based upon your thoughts. Unhappiness and failure is very less dependent on present situation, and more on your thoughts about it.When you believe in yourself, you learn the first secret of success and happiness. Once you are done with first secret, you become remarkable at doing great things, without the need for anything more. Often to be on right track is not about going somewhere new, it’s about seeing familiar ground in new ways. Once you do, you will realize the only difference between stumbling blocks and stepping stones is how you use them.

2. Long term joys cannot be bought, but earned

What makes you happy? Intangible things like affection, happy memories, or tangible objects that become absolute even before you become thoroughly comfortable with. You get to choose, but it’s wise to stop caring for the things you can touch, and start caring about the things that can touch you.Whatever you do, never completely sacrifice your time for money. Enjoy the gifts that money cannot buy. Let your heart and mind work as one, built that integration between them. Promise yourself that you will never make excuses and will stay true to your special ones, your values and your purpose. Do what it takes, so that one day, many blue moons from now, you can look back at your life with an honest smile and happy heart.

3. You are better off without some people you want

You will get to see the actual colors of people who say they care about you when your days are less shiny or you are in tough situations and need them the most. Keep your eyes and mind open, and notice who stands with you and who don’t, and be thankful to those who leave you, for giving you an opportunity to grow and awareness to appreciate right people. In short, who does not appreciate and respect your presence, gift them your absence.

4. No, everyone will not support you

If you take every insult or rude behavior of people around you on your heart, you will most likely spend rest of your life totally offended and upset. One of the valuable lessons that we all learn at some point at life is that we don’t have to agree with everyone, everyone does not have to agree with us, and that is okay. Don’t let opinions of others make you feel down. Bruce Lee once said “I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine”. Live this quote.We have been placed on earth to live our own life, discover our own purpose, and if we try to live the idea of life according to others, we will never feel happy. So do not see your life with the eyes and brain of someone else, do not worry what others think of you. You do not need anyone’s approval about anything; your own approval is enough to validate it.

5. First step is always difficult

First step to valuable things is never easy, great things never happen without great efforts. Your greatest achievements depends on your first step, that you either can take right now, or can delay for next ten years waiting for more of resources, time, money etc. Be strong, have faith in yourself and give yourself strength to take first step to anything that is valuable to you. Remember, strong people are not those who never get weak, but those who force themselves to take another step when their knees shake.

6. Things you like, might not come quick

Life is not easy, and it never stays smooth permanently. If you expect it be smooth, you will get disappointed at every turning point. Achieving anything valuable in life needs effort and takes time, and for that you need to align your efforts with your goals, everyday. Persistence and consistency is what leads to what we want to achieve, so be consistent in making efforts and keep reminding yourself the value of your target. No matter how difficult it seems, every bit of effort will take you closer to what you want to achieve.

7. You cannot control life

We cannot control what our destiny brings in our life, but the only thing we can control is our reaction, our reaction to situations that happen to us. Sooner you accept and adapt this reality, more quickly you will bounce back from lows of your life. In order to live a happy and satisfying life, we need to accept whatever it offers us.With time, you will realize whenever you were rejected from something that you thought is good for you, you were actually redirected to something better. You don’t need to have everything on right place to find peace and joy. You just need to do your best, and then relax with the faith that things will work out. Let go and just let life happen the way it’s supposed to. You cannot change outcomes, but those outcomes have power to change you, so let them happen and help you grow to your full potential.

8. Make peace with your past, and move on

We all have a past, we all have something that push us back, but remember if you are carrying strong emotions of past in your present, those emotions may hold you back from living a productive life. Whatever has happened to you a year ago, a month ago or a week ago; you can either feel sorry for yourself or can treat those situations as a gift of life that told you necessary lessons. Every unexpected situation is either an opportunity to learn and grow or an obstacle that keeps you stuck.  You choose how you want to treat it.
Bottom Line: There will be times when you may feel everything that could possibly go wrong is going wrong. You may feel like you will be stuck in that situation forever, but you wouldn’t. One good thing about bad time is, it never lasts forever. Sure the sun stops shining sometimes, there may be a huge thunderstorm, but at last sun will make it way again, it will shine again. Sometimes, you just need to stay strong and as positive as possible in order to see sunshine breaking through clouds again.

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